Valuing Family and Friends

Today the balance sheeting exercise of assessing various aspects of life looks at family and friends. Quite possibly the title says it all and the main questions are: To what extent do I currently value them? And, how could I do more? How would you evaluate your satisfaction regarding this aspect of your life? A difficult question I know. The purpose of this review is to ponder such points, even if the answers are not so clear-cut.

Having loved ones close, even if they are not all geographically near, and being connected in whatever way to friends is very important for me. I consider myself to be fortunate in having not only my English family, but also the Italian family of my partner in my life.

Friends, not numbers
I prefer having a few good friends rather than the company of large numbers of acquaintances, as my presence on Twitter attests. That said, people are important to me and, I believe, if we want this world to be a better place than it currently is then being friendly is a crucial beginning.

Elements of friendship
Laughter, tears, reflection and the space to be silent would be near the top of my list. Honesty, trust and loyalty would be at the very top. I would like to think I offer friends these things, I know my friends give them to me.

Making an assessment
A few weeks ago I spent an afternoon with my partner and two dear friends in theory looking for office furniture. In practice we just enjoyed the few hours away from the desks in harmony with each other. Making time for more such moments would impact positively on me over the coming quarter leading up to the end of the year. I am currently with my UK family and it is strange to be at the family home without my dad being around. Life not only gives to us, but also takes from us.

Overall rating
8 out of 10. Thinking about this issue as I have been writing this posting, I realize I could be even more present for family and friends. Over the coming months I intend to do this.

Until the next posting, thanks for being here with me today. If you wish to share your input on this subject please get in touch.



6 Responses to Reflections

  1. I appreciate your article. It is true that we ~I?~ often take those I care about for granted. In the days to come I will be more mindful of that error on my part.

    I work as a Counselor-Case Manager at an Emergency Shelter for homeless people and treasure my serenity that I often find in solitude. Life is so fragile and we never know how long certain people we care about will be around.

    After reading your article I called my Elder Dad. No answer, but I will try again.

    Namaste, Che Peta

    • bgdtcoaching says:

      I truly thank you for your input here and sincerely hope the call will be answered next time. Many thanks for sharing with us here.

  2. Dawn says:

    I feel that I am connected by love with so many people, starting with my children. They are my true family as are so many in my neighborhood, community and in the world.

    Sometimes posts like this remind me of my parents who were not the ones who nurtured my spirit or cared for me as I grew, I was given into foster care at an early age.

    I can tell you the names of those who influenced me. I can tell you how I felt when they listened to my tears and when they said, “You are full of promise.” I believed them.

    My family goes beyond the usual definitions … I believe this is true for so many. The beauty of this post is expansive Brian and I am very thankful to you for writing it.

    • bgdtcoaching says:

      The definitions of family are certainly ours to create and being connected can add to the beauty of life. Much gratitude to you Dawn for being part of the conversation here.

  3. Family matters so much, and friends too. I have recently had to stand back myself, and look at things. I work 7 days a week most weeks and this leaves very little time for me and for my family and friends.

    Getting caught up in making an honest living, those the most precious to me are on ‘standy by’, but with parents of 83+ how long can I do this? Friends think me rude perhaps and unsociable because I am always working.

    My best friend and neighbour stopped calling in or phoning me for a chat – her reason ‘Well you are always so busy, I didnt want to disturb you’.

    I have taken ‘stock’ of what I want from life, all work and no time with those most precious to me will be of little value.

    Beginning with this weekend, I am putting aside every other Saturday to spend shopping with my Mum – I hope my 22 year old will join us too, but, appreciative that she also needs time with Mum alone, I plan to do something special with her at least once a week.

    My friends will begin to see a change too and I intend to plan at least one social outing a week too.

    All this will cut down the amount of time I work, but perhaps this will be a positive thing as I streamline my efforts and are more careful with time management.

    Families are precious and no amount of working could ever add up to the value they hold in my heart.

    A great article Brian 🙂

    • bgdtcoaching says:

      Lovely input Lesley and my heartfelt thanks to you for sharing here.

      Starting on a new course of life takes courage and strength and love. Each moment, each step taken with your loved ones will surely give you so much as you give to them. Work will still be there, but you will be able to bring a new dimension to it having stepped away from it for a short while.

      Good luck, I know such decisions are never easy though they are key elements of life. Please keep in touch as you venture out.


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