How do we know it really matters?

February 23, 2017

Junk stall


To deal with the question ‘How do we know it really matters?‘ let me list ten brief responses, in alphabetical order, for you to a) ponder, b) ignore, or c) use as a starting point for the creation of your own answer:

01) By listening to our heart.

02) If it didn’t matter we wouldn’t be considering it.

03) It represents our best efforts.

04) It’s a matter of instinct.

05) It’s a question of aligning actions with values.

06) It’s common sense.

07) Life feels better as a result.

08) The smile we receive from X tells us so.

09) We don’t, but the alternative could be worse.

10) We get to sleep peacefully at night.

Thanks for reading this ‘How do we know it really matters?‘ post.


Skype: bgdtskype
Twitter: @bgdtcoaching

About Brian

Brian Groves DipM MCIM Chartered Marketer, CTI-trained Co-Active Coach and Freelance Trainer, supplies professional and personal development through coaching, coaching workshops, marketing development training and English language training.

As an Adjunct Professor at the Catholic University of Milan, Italy, Brian teaches a postgraduate course based on dramatic texts and elements of coaching to examine various work-related performance matters.


Heart Poems Captured From Dreams (2017)

How to deliver your potential successfully on the stage of work (2016)

The stage of work (2016)

Performance skills at work (2015)

Personal performance potential at work (2014)

Coaching, performing and thinking at work (2013)

Reflections on performance at work (2012)

Elements of theatre at work (2010)

Training through drama for work (2009)

Seeing the future

February 20, 2014

Future buiding

I’m not suggesting any of us has the ability of actually seeing the future in the sense of looking out of the window onto it or anything of the like, though you may well have this talent.

Yet our dreams, turned into smart goals and filled out with specific action plans, testify to a capacity for seeing the future at least in our hearts. By working each day on our chosen objectives we are taking ourselves into tomorrow in the best possible way.

Seeing the future as we would like it to be, of course, does not mean we have to deny the reality of the moment. Our approach to life though certainly sets the tone for our attitude towards now, and this in turn impacts on how we see and go about building the future.

Whatever we have today is the result of our efforts yesterday and before. Our circumstances influenced us to do some things whilst ignoring or stopping other things. We chose through our input where we are now. In a similar fashion, tomorrow is being built in the present moment.

Seeing the future may include more of the same now or a panorama completely different. Whatever we choose, it just leaves me to thank you for spending some time here today.

If you’d like to leave a comment about seeing the future, please do so.

Warmest regards.


Skype: bgdtskype

Twitter: @bgdtcoaching





About Brian

Brian Groves DipM MCIM Chartered Marketer and CTI-trained co-active coach, supplies professional and personal development through coaching, coaching workshops, marketing development training and English language training.

As an adjunct professor at the Catholic University of Milan, Italy, Brian teaches a postgraduate course based on dramatic texts and elements of coaching to examine various work-related performance matters.


Coaching, performing and thinking at work (2013), Reflections on performance at work (2012), Elements of theatre at work (2010) and Training through drama for work (2009).

Reflections – Spring Cleaning

March 31, 2011

Daisy always gets busy this time of the year. For her, like many folk I guess, the change of season is a time to spring into action.

She takes delight in having the apartment building looking its best for Easter. The leaves of the plants are polished and the communal runners washed. To avoid being dusted as part of the spring cleaning it’s best to keep moving.

Spring cleaning, however, need not be restricted to the visible elements of life. I love the idea of taking time out to explore habits, objectives and even beliefs which may have accumulated over time.

Doing something just because it has always been done is usually an ideal candidate for spring cleaning. Looking at the motivation for a habit might bring to light a reasoning no longer applicable to our actual being.

I appreciate some habits such as Daisy’s desire for cleanliness over Easter can bring pleasure. Yet understanding why we do something is a way of taking responsibility for our life.

That we might then choose to continue with the habit is certainly all well and good. We are undertaking actions from a position of awareness, which is surely a good thing in a world littered with mindless actions.

A project might be staggering on, though its eventual completion no longer holds any meaning. Items on To Do Lists may occasionally benefit from a spring clean. If a task hasn’t been done, despite it sitting on the list for weeks, its presence there can perhaps be questioned.

If you would like to share your input on the issue of spring cleaning, please leave a comment. In any case, thanks for being here today.


Reflections – All About You

March 17, 2011

In the previous posting, ‘Something About Me’, I spoke about myself. Now I’d love to focus on you. You are, after all, here right now and so it seems only right I acknowledge your presence.


It’s admirable you are truly yourself. Your style, way of being, sets you apart. You know what you want and strive to achieve your goals. That you chose to read this – let’s be honest, more people in the world currently choose not to – in itself deserves my gratitude.


Anyone not interested in ideas concerning the magnificence of life, with its accompanying hiccups, would not have gotten this far into the posting right now. As you are still here, it’s fair to say you are open-hearted, even open-minded, about life from various perspectives.


Thinking how to describe your uniqueness, my mind is drawn to books on a bookshelf. As a book, you make up the collection whilst being special in your unique way. You contain a wealth of wisdom and enjoyment, in line with your particular genre or specific title.

And how do I know all this about you? I’ve based my belief chiefly on that fact you made a conscious choice to arrive at this page. Being confronted with many offerings each day, it says much about you that you decided to give me a few moments of your attention.

Yet for all my words there is so much about you I’m not aware of. Still, you know how to contact me if you wish to share some more details.

In the meantime, thank you for being here today.


Reflections – Momentum

February 21, 2011

Synonyms for the word ‘momentum’ include ‘impetus’ and ‘drive’. Forward motion is implied, and with this the idea of moving towards a goal comes to mind.

Transferring momentum created in the planning stage through to the completion of a goal is not always easy. Good intentions are not enough, enthusiasm often wanes as obstacles arise.

Sometimes additional energy is needed. Anthony Robbins asked: “What simple action could you take today to produce a new momentum toward success in your life?”

However, momentum is not just related to new inputs. If we can continue with what we are already doing, many times this too can lead to success.

A while back I left a sales visit with a signed contract. In the momentum of the moment, I chatted with the person in the lift/elevator and as a result gained a second new client that day. The occasion would surely have been lost had I interrupted the successful sales mindset at the doors of the lift.

It’s similar to maintaining a professional air even as we are queuing to retrieve our coats after a networking meeting. We never know who may be standing next to us. Life often tests our commitment to success by throwing us opportunities just as we feel like easing up the momentum.

Well, rather than running out of words, losing momentum so to speak, I’ll stop now. If you would like to share your input on the question of momentum, please leave a comment below.

Thanks for reading this today.


Reflections – Focus

February 17, 2011

In a world which places much importance on measuring and determining the value of an action from the results obtained, focusing on the outcome when tasked to do something is understandable.

Focusing exclusively on the end

Yet focusing exclusively on the end, might mean we miss the actual moment of doing the task. It can be argued provided we get the thing done it doesn’t matter. Perhaps that is right, although there will be times when how we do something is important too.

Multitasking or rudeness?

I can remember an occasion a bank teller dealt with my query as she focused on a report on her desk. When I asked if I should return at a more convenient time, I was met with a frosty reply that she was very capable of multitasking. I now bank online.

Lack of focus

The lack of focus or ‘shoddiness of craftsmanship’ as my grandfather would have said, shows up everywhere nowadays. Details get taken down in a haphazard way. The spelling of names and noting of account numbers are likewise hit or miss affairs over the phone.

Being focused

If we are honest we know when we are doing something with little or no focus. Although we might think otherwise, others also notice when we are ‘going through the motions’ as we ponder what’s for dinner or make mental plans for the weekend.

The Buddhist teacher Thich Nhat Hanh sums up being mindful of what we are doing with the concept of ‘Washing the dishes to wash the dishes’, being completely focused on the fact one is washing the dishes, rather than mentally rushing to the next thing to be done.

As ever, other perspectives are possible. I’d love to hear your opinions on the issue of focus, so please feel free to leave a comment below.

Thanks for connecting.


Reflections – Living This Present Moment

February 14, 2011

It’s difficult not to be drawn to the news at present. More than ever it seems events around the world are impacting on our doorsteps, regardless of where we live.

In the face of present pain, suffering and calls for freedom through democracy, it’s easy to feel numb or inadequate. Headlines are dominated by masses: masses of faces and masses of numbers.

Yet through the crowd of numbers one stands out. One world, one life, one you, one me, one present moment.

We can choose to focus on the pain or tap into the energy of the moment to get up, take stock of the many wonderful things in life, and live fully in the present moment.

Unearthing the abundance of the present may take a little digging around but it is surely there. Let’s think about the presence in our hearts of loved ones, our ability to laugh – even if only at ourselves, – our senses capable of putting us in contact with nature, and so much more I’m sure.

The American writer Henry David Thoreau put it as follows: “You must live in the present, launch yourself on every wave, find your eternity in each moment.”

How we live this present moment, for example in tranquillity and peace, excitement or concern, is a matter of choice. Worrying, in any case, gets us nowhere except down.

Some may be immersed in an activity which leaves little time for distraction, others might be taking those first tentative steps to fulfilling a dream. Regardless of circumstances, this present moment is truly now. I hope you are living it in abundance.

If you would like to share your input on this present moment, please leave a comment below. In the meantime, thanks for being present here today.


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